Everything In Life Is Relative
Yuli Azarch | April 19, 2017 | No Comments on Everything In Life Is Relative
Everything in life is relative. Your mind constantly seeks to compare yourself with others. This applies to any area of your life: Financial, health, wealth, career, mindset, relationship, time. I keep observing this on myself.
Here are two examples:
You earn $1 million dollars per year
- You can feel ecstatic and happy when all of your peers and people you know actually earn $100K per year if you compare yourself to them. You earn 10x more than the people you associate yourself with!
- You can also be overly angry and frustrated if all of your peers and people you hang out with earning $10 million dollars per year and more. You are doing worse than all the people you hang out with.
You work out 4 times per week
- You could feel very happy about it when all of the people around you do not work out and are fat if you compare yourself to them.
- Or you can compare yourself to top world athletes, who are doing ironmans, spartan races, and workout every single day, and feel unhappy with your results.
Our brain is tricky, so we clearly need to learn to control it better. In both examples, most people could agree that we are doing great things: Earning $1M per year and working out 4 times per week.
But depending on who you compare yourself with and what your inner dialog in the brain is (People who are doing better vs people who are doing worse) your level of happiness and also your progress lies there.
On top of it: We get used to anything and pretty fast
I noticed on myself that I get used to anything very fast. The same observation holds true on all the people around me. Once you get used to something, everything becomes relative to the status quo you are in right now.
- I just moved into a luxury apartment last week. It’s the best place I stayed for the last 2 years. I have amazing views and live by the beach. After I live in the luxury apartment, it would suck going back to any other apartment of less quality, because that’s my new standard. So I can come back an accommodation I was actually quite happy in before, and I’ll be unhappy because of my new standard. I got used to it now after 1 week of living here, and I don’t get so excited even now. As opposed to before, I was living in mediocre accommodation, and it felt so awesome to move to a luxury apt!
- I am traveling the world for 3 years. This was a long time dream for me when I was younger. After a while, very briefly I got used to this lifestyle of traveling the world and having an online business. This became my standard. And my brain started doing comparisons to where I am today. Now I look at other goals, compared to where I am now. Simply traveling and earning money online is not necessarily better, because that’s what I already do.
So in the examples above, are we really doing well? Are we actually doing bad? It’s all relative and always will be. Here are my thoughts on the matter:
- People tend to compare themselves with people who are doing worse than them, so they can feel good about themselves. Comparing yourselves to people who are doing better than you makes you feel bad. It will force you to look deep inside and actually work on it and improve things. This is a good thing for progress.
- You want to progress and do better in life. If not, you would not be reading this blog. If you will compare yourself with people who are doing worse and hang out with people who do worse, you will not be forced to grow and progress. You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with. Surround yourself with people who kick ass in life, and you will be forced to raise your standards and kick ass as well.
- In life, you either grow or die. We all grow regularly, each one at difference paces. Every time when you grow, you hit a new plateau, and that becomes your new base standard, based on what you compare things in terms of how you are doing (Good VS. Bad)
- Entrepreneurs easily fall into the trap of comparing themselves to people who are doing much better. This may make them feeling not complete with themselves and less happy. I have been there and struggle with this as well. I know many struggles with it as well. You obviously do not want to stop growing, but you want to feel darn happy. I love the following quote by Tony Robbins: “To change your life, change your expectations for appreciation.” If you can learn to appreciate what you have, and in live in states of gratitude, all of a while you surround yourself and associate yourself with people who are doing 10x better than you, you are basically forced to grow very fast without losing a sense of happiness.
Wherever you are in life, never forget it is all relative, for the good and bad. Someone will always be doing better than you and someone will be doing worse than you.
Please share your thoughts in the comments below.